things you never want your husband to say part one

not to over-blog today, but i must mention this. i believe i will start some sort of list... it would appear that colby says more than his share of ridiculous/embarassing one-liners. here goes:

"look how hairy my back is now!"

ugh. like i would ever want to look at his hairy back that is apparently hairier than it was the last time it was brought to my attention. ugh again. im off to fetch a five buck pizza because i need the distraction. and i will prob watch the lizard video one more time for good measure.

when colby showed me this, we both were crying because its so funny

just a tad bit of info

so, a few things:

firstly, "i got bangs. my hair's so now!"
love them. and colby says they make my whole face look different - in a good way - and will be waiting to hear the confirmation from adoring fans :)

and! my diploma came in the mail! it is just a piece of cardstock with laser printed words... and thats it! its officially official - i have learned and earned the BS that is Human Development. and what do i intend to do with said BS education, you ask? help humans develop.

and finally:
dear brooke,
let us please go to the warm caribbean for sun and fun in may. i promise to be a good girl and not freak on the airplane. also, i promise to get extra hot and sexy so we can be skanky biotches on the beach like this girl:

also, i love this suit and want to buy it but am scared about the bosoms. thoughts?

sincerely,
des

this is probably directly correlated to the fact that i still haven't found a job

i have been into some deep, depressing music lately. rachael yamagata is my latest artist of choice - and if you go to pandora.com, you can customize a music station based on one artist - they will guess other people you might like that have similar sounds to the name you enter. and most of the time, they have been dead on about my need for sad lonelies.

however, the shiny toy guns station is really good too. there's just something about chicks who play music...

anyways, if you have any good deep, dark recommendations for me i would love to hear them. being as im about one monogrammed party favor away from turning to country music.

at the risk of sounding like im crazy...

there is something to be said about disappointing fruit.

the other day, i spent at least five minutes preparing an orange for my noshing. and not only was it significantly smaller than i was lead to believe by the ultra thick rind, it tasted faintly like butt. and there was no other option than to throw it in the trash.

now, on any other normal day, perhaps this would not have destroyed my outlook on life. but for whatever the reason - probably because i was extra meticulous about picking the white strings of pith off the orange - i was totally pissed off. i mean, the disappointment ratio was so ridiculous! think about the proportion of an orange to the capabilities it had to ruin everything.

ugh. i should just go back to eating fruit snacks and fruit leather as my "5 a day".

ahem.

so let it be written:
the first official book of the deswestern book club is Angels and Demons by Dan Brown. and if reading doesn't sound like your speed, feel free to check this biznass out for some enthusiasm: http://angelsanddemons.com/
(if Tom Hanky Panky doesn't do it for you, perhaps Ewan MacGregor will)

thank you much.

idea?

so now that i have officially wasted the last days of 2008 immersing myself in all things stephenie meyer, it would appear that im now ready to get back to real life.

and by real life, i mean fictional characters that perhaps are not quite as dreamy/obsessive/intriguing as my boyfriend eddie cullen.

so shall we all read a book together, then?

maybe a really good one like Angels and Demons - the prequel to DaVinci Code?

or maybe i need a good smutty one to pass the time - uh oh, have i crossed over into Danielle Steele territory?

Uncle Tom's Cabin?
Jane Eyre? (again)
The Picture of Dorian Gray?

perhaps i should simply stick to what i know:
Real Simple mags and various blogs i love to spy on